Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Ready?

Were you ready for all of this? I sure as heck wasn't. I mean, yes, I was ready to start a family (well as "ready" as one can be right?!). I was ready for our lives to change. I was ready to change up our budget and our sleep schedule. I was ready to bring a person into this world, a little person to call me mom.

But this... blood draws, tests, appointments, medications, bleeding, crying, heartache. THAT I was not ready for. Sure, you know it is a possibility. We all know that it is a possibility. But really, the first one? Nah...

Then again, what were the chances of getting pregnant right away?

As time passes I think more and more about how naive we were. As if we could somehow choose when this would happen. We could plan. That's just it though isn't it? It isn't truly up to us. This isn't like some new product that you can just go pick up at the store one day and know it will work right out of the box.

Some days I wonder if I'm cut out for all of this. How much heartbreak can a girl take? How many pregnancies and miscarriages and waiting will it take to bring home our baby?

But at least now I know. I know that I am ready. No matter what it takes, I am ready. I will gladly give as much blood as they need to take. I will take whatever medications that my doctor wants to prescribe. Naivety is gone.

I know what I am getting myself into and I'm ready.

Some days are still harder than others. Sometimes it is the little things that catch you off guard and bring tears to your eyes. But this will all be worth it. I know it will. God has a plan. I have to trust and be patient.

***Proud Aunt moment. My newest little niece is freaking adorable! Here are the 2 of us on Super Bowl Sunday and then a more recent pic. I just love getting to spend time with my nieces. It is so much fun. Hopefully this is just me getting some practice for my own kiddos. :)



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